


What If

by Thatwatty



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Heavy Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-28
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-02-08 17:26:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18627859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thatwatty/pseuds/Thatwatty
Summary: What if there was no fix it for the Malec break up. What if Magnus gave up. And what if Asmodeus wasn't a complete dick of a father?





	What If

**Author's Note:**

> This is canon in the beginning but just the beginning. Enjoy

“You have to break his heart to save his life”  
“I don’t think I can live without you.” /  
/ “I need a break, from us.” /

Magnus felt numb all over. He fell to his knees after Alec left not once turning back. He sat there staring ahead but not seeing. His everything just walked away from him. He thought that he would survive not having his magic with Alec by his side. He thought once he has grieved the loss of his magic he will learn to do everything else without magic with Alec by his side. But he thought wrong. It was his fault, he didn’t know what he did but somehow he knew it was his fault. It was his fault for not being enough reason for Alec to stay. It was his fault he wasn’t powerful enough to save New York without losing his magic and it is his fault for his everything to leave him.

  
A portal has opened in front of him but it didn’t matter.

  
“My poor son, let your father fix this for you and let us go home” he heard his father, Asmodeus, say. He didn’t respond. Normally he would have fought hard as he was being lifted and carried by his father into Edom but all the fight has left him. It didn’t matter what happened to him, nothing mattered, he didn’t matter.

Later his father put him down in bed and tucked him in like a parent would do to his child. He laid there but stayed awake. Come morning his father came to get him and he followed. He was like a puppet with his strings being pulled by his father. He remembered how his father was when he was but a child and his father was a great and loving one. He taught Magnus about magic and a lot more. Even now he knew, no matter how evil his father is, his chosen son will always be his weakness. He always wanted him to rule by his side and he did want to but after learning what Asmodeus did to his mother he ran.

“It will pass eventually and you’ll be able to continue on with life, Maggie. In time” Asmodeus told him one evening as he was bathing him. Silent tears flowed down his cheeks and he could just feel his father’s pity as he wiped those tears. He wanted to lash out and tell his father that it won’t, that it will never pass. That he already had an idea on why his magic is back and the price his father demanded. But he can’t blame his father, it was his fault for letting Alec see how crushed he was about something as trivial as the loss of his magic. Yes, that was what his magic was, trivial against Alec’s love. For Alec and his love for him was the world and everything for Magnus. And now, nothing. He knew that if he went back to Alec now that he has his magic back that his father would do something unimaginable to Alec and he can’t have that.

“What do you want, Maggie. I hate seeing you like this. Where is my sassy boy that I adore so much?” he heard Asmodeus ask, desperation colored his voice. For once, after so many days, Magnus looked at his father and see exhaustion there which is very rare for the prince of hell.

“To go back” he simply answered in a hoarse voice. His father clenched his jaw.

  
“ Go back to that shadowhunter who left you? Who agreed readily to my deal?”

“Yes”

  
“You know I can’t do that without a price right?”

“Yes, My magic. Please, I have no need for such a trivial thing. Not anymore” he said as he watch his father’s face morph into despair, pity and then defeat.

  
“Alright”

“Wait, I need to get something first. Can you do it tonight.” He knew his father realized what he wanted to get as his eyes darkened.

“ Please Father, just this last time? I have lived for centuries too long, let me have this.” Asmodeus’s face was grim but nodded nonetheless.

Later that evening as Magnus laid in bed with Asmodeus sitting next to him.

"I will make this painless. I do hope that you'll be at peace with your decision" he told Magnus as he started to feel his magic solwly leave him.

" It's done. Should I portal you to the Institute?"

"No, I am unwanted there. Portal me to Cat's" Asmodeus nodded in understanding. And opened a portal. Magnus stood up but before he went in, he turned back and said to his father.

  
"You were a manipulative father and although manipulative, you did it because it was what you thought was right to keep me safe and happy. Thank you" and then went into the portal.

Magnus arrived at Cat's livingroom. His friend's current accomodation seems to be a cabin. He heard a rustle and then a "Magnus!" ,next thing he felt was a small body colliding with his thighs.

  
"Sweatpea!" he exclaimed and lifted her up for a hug. Catarina came next and on her face was relief and worry.

"Magnus, where have you been? You had us worried. I asked Alec but he also didn't know where you were." She asked.

  
He sighed and let Madzie down.

  
"Sweatpea, can you go play in another room or outside for a moment? Your mother and I have something to talk about."

"okay"

  
When Madzie was out of sight Magnus sat down as did Cat.

  
" I was in Edom" Cat gasped.

  
" What-" She started to say but he cut her off.

  
"Alec. . . Alec made a deal with my father, our relationship for the price of having my magic back"

  
"But Magnus, you-"

  
"I traded it back for my freedom. For all my father's manipulative and evil tendencies, he is still my father and as his chosen son, I am still his weakness" he said hands gripping each other.

  
Catarina looked at him with sad eyes. She approached him and gave him a hug. But then pulled back startled.

"Magnus what did you do!" she gasped. He looked away.

  
"Why would you do this to yourself?"

  
"I'm tired Catarina, so very tired. And I just wish to spend whatever time I have left with my bestfriend and my sweatpea." he answered resignation clear in his voice. Catarina looked like she wanted to rebute but kept her silence for a moment but then.

"But taking poison?"

"it is not technically a poison"

  
"for a warlock maybe but for a mundane? Because that is what you are now, A mundie"

  
" Catarina. . ."

  
"Magnus, what would I do without you?"

" What you do before and more, you have sweatpea now, don't you" he told her seriously.

His days were spent helping Catarina take care of Madzie, a walk in the forest and watching the sun rise and go down behind the trees. And slowly his body deteriorated until all he can do was lay in bed. Catarina and Madzie stayed by his side and when both females were asleep, his father came to convince him to accept his magic back but Magnus refused. It was because of his magic that he lost Alec and if that magic won't bring Alec back to him, which it won't because he knew how stubborn his lover Former Lover is. His father never gave up though and he stayed through the night combing his hair and telling him stories of long ago.

  
"Magnus!" He heard Catarina yell but it seemed so far away. He felt like he was floating.

Catarina POV

  
Magnus was fading fast. And much as she hated Alec for the state he left her bestfriend, she knew Alec had good intentions in mind and she knew, Magnus was blaming himself for whatever it was that driven his lover away from him. And she is sure that Magnus would want to see Alec before he passes. So she portaled outside the institute and demanded to see Alec.

  
"Catarina? What is it?"

  
"it's about Magnus" she said. A worried and pained look passed over Alec's face before it was replaced with resolve and determination.

  
"We already broke up and I don't know where he is"

  
"I know and I don't care. But Magnus needs you. He's - he's dying"

"Wha-" Alec's voice broke.

"Please, just, just come with me" and Alec did. They portaled straight to Magnus' room in Cat's cabin.

Alec's POV

  
When he laid his eyes on Magnus, he broke into sob. It's after lilith all over again. He quickly approached the bed and slumped down next to Magnus.

"Magnus" he called in a broken voice. He broke both their hearts just so he doesn't have to see Magnus like this. Where did he go wrong?

"Magnus,open your eyes. Please" he pleaded.

  
"He was in Edom and traded his magic to get back here" he heard Catarina say and he continued to cry silently while holding his love's hand.

  
"He knew that you made a deal and what the price was. And he blamed himself, and punished himself by drinking a poison. I couldn't do anything, the only way to cure him is for him to get his magic back but he refuses."

  
He cried for Magnus and himself, for both of them. For being fools in love.  
Magnus gasped and opened his eyes though they were unfocused.  
"Alec" he called in a hoarse voice.  
"Hey, I'm here" he told him and he caressed Magnus' cheeks.  
"Hi"  
"Hey, I wanted to ask you this. Magnus, will you marry me?" he asked tearfully.  
"Yes" Magnus answered with a soft smile and unfocused eyes which just made Alec's tears flow faster as he put the ring on his fiance's finger.  
"Aku . . . Cinta . . . . Kamu" Magnus rasped out before he let out a long exhale And his hand went limp.

"Magnus. . . Magnus? . . Magnus!" he frantically shook his fiance. He held his face and kissed his forehead, eyes,nose and then finally his lips. The kisses were salty from his tears and he just held Magnus' body close as he let out a mournful sob. He heard crying but he ignored it in favor of holding his fiance's steadily cooling body.  
It was when sunrise when they burned Magnus' body. Jace, Clary and Simon where there with them. And as the embers died leaving nothing but ash, Catarina approached him and handed him something.

"This is his Omamori, he fully intended to give it to you.Take care of it" she said and he nodded. 

His hands clenched around it, before finally turning his back vowing to be back.

 


End file.
